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Genesis as a Personal Creation Process

by Grace Marie

Throughout history, stories are written or told to convey a teaching, such as the parables of Jesus.  The deeper meanings of these simple parables were easily interpreted and used as examples to help people develop characteristics that would allow them to live as better human beings.

The first chapter of the Bible, Genesis, tells the story that in 7 days, God created heaven and earth.  As a child born into a strict Polish Roman Catholic practice, my perspective on this story called forth an image of an all-powerful, awesome God whom one feared and did not question or look into more deeply.  One accepted on faith (and a fear of the consequences of not believing) that these events happened and were true. 

As often happens when one grows older and gets exposed to higher education, this story became a fantasy.  It was not in a form that I could accept, be attracted to, study, or talk about any further, and I discovered that there were others who felt the same way.  The story was considered far-fetched when one studied the theory of Evolution and viewed it from an “educated” perspective.  But looking more deeply into the theory of Evolution, its sequence follows the creation process described in Genesis, if you keep in mind that 1 million earth years, as our human minds can conceive them, might equal one day in the mind of the divine in telling the story of Genesis.

My interest of Genesis re-surfaced during a class relating to that subject, with Dr. Neil Douglas-Klotz (NDK) in the Abwoon Interspiritual Leadership Program (AILP).  Although I had attended his Genesis workshop twice previously, it was not until the third time that its deeper personal meaning began to unveil its mystery.  The wall between Genesis and me was coming down stone by stone, and I became very curious about what was on the other side.

Using NDK’s book The Genesis Meditation: A Shared Practice of Peace for Christians, Muslims and Jews to make simple translations, and using outline of the cycle of Genesis Dances from his accompanying CD Beginnings, I began to feel within a shift in my thoughts and feelings around the subject.  That led me to consider the questions:

-  What is the story of Genesis all about?

-  What aversions do I feel toward it?  Why?

-  How can I interpret the story to understand how it can personally affect me through its hidden meaning? 

To unveil the mystery, I started with 3 simple skeleton outlines from NDK’s work to help decipher the Genesis myth:

I.    Genesis/Creation – The first outline uses the Hebrew phrases from the chapter of Genesis in the Torah that are translated and/or interpreted into their very simple approximate meanings, as indicated with the words in English that are shown in parentheses.  Additionally, there are phrases from Proverbs; one phrase listed is from the Quran in Arabic; and another phrase is a combination of Aramaic and Greek.

The King James English Version (KJV) of the Bible, New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures, and the Quran are also included to use in comparison.  Bear in mind that these were translated into English from Hebrew, Arabic, Aramaic, or Greek. 

If one speaks another language fluently, one understands the concept of translating from one foreign or non-native language to one’s own native tongue.  There are nuances from one culture to another that simply cannot be conveyed into words.  The interpretations given below, are a combination of approximate, literal and my own translations.  Hence, Approximate Translations are signified by AT.  I speak 3 languages, Polish, Spanish and English; studied French for 4 years; have studied important prayers and phrases of Jesus in Aramaic (the original language of Jesus), various prayers and phrases from Islam in Arabic, and others in Sanskrit, Hebrew, etc.

I.  GENESIS/CREATION

1.  BEFORE THE BEGINNING (Gen 1:1)

B’reshit bara Elohim et hashamayim we’et ha’aretz.

B’reshit (beginning) bara (created) Elohim (one who is many, or God) et hashamayim (heaven or wave, light vibration) we’et ha’aretz (and earth or form, particle).

“In the beginning, the Many created form through wave, vibration, light, and particle.” AT

“In the beginning, God created the heavens and earth.”  KJV

2.  EXPLORING THE GERM OF THE SEED (Gen 1:2)

Wa ha’aretz hayeta tohu wa bohu.

Wa ha’aretz (the earth) hayeta tohu (without form) wa bohu (and void).

“No form existed, only void.”  AT

“and the earth was without form and void.” KJV

3.  PLAYING WITH RESISTANCE, CONFUSING THE CONFUSION (Gen 1:2)

Wa chosheckh ‘al-penei tehom.

Wa chosheckh (the darkness) ‘al-penei (was on the face/surface) tehom (of the deep/depths).

“Deep Darkness, a black hole, existed.”  AT

“and darkness was upon the face of the deep.” KJV

4.  BREATHING INTO THE FLOW (Gen 1:2)

Wa ruach Elohim mera-he-fet ‘al pennei hammayim.

Wa ruach (the breath/spirit of) Elohim mera-he-fet (began to move) ‘al pennei (on the surface/face of) hammayim (the waters of the primordial flow).

“From the energy of the Many working together, a primordial wave began to flow, in the first sign of movement.”  AT

“and the spirit of God moved on the face of the waters.”  KJV

5.  BIRTH OF A NEW CONSCIOUSNESS (Gen 1:3)

Wayyo’mer’elohim yehi‘or wa yehi’aor.

Wayyo’mer’elohim yehi‘or (the vibration, wave of consciousness was, is and will be) wa (the whole realm of existence) yehi’aor (aor – light).

“The light, wave and vibration of consciousness, and the whole realm of existence, was, is, and always will be.”  AT

“and God said, Let there be light, and there was light.”  KJV

6.  CELEBRATING THE NEW CONSCIOUSNESS (Gen 1:4)

Wa yara ‘elohim et haor kitob.

Wa yara (looking into the whole of existence) ‘elohim (the One who is Many) et haor kitob (blessed its new reflection of consciousness.) 

“The One who is Many, looking into the whole of existence, blessed its new reflection of consciousness.”  AT

“and God saw the Light, that it was good:  God divided the light from the darkness.”  KJV

7.  EMBRACING THE NEW (Proverbs 8:22-24)

Ya qanani re’shit darko quedem mif’alaw me’az.

Ya (Yahweh) qanani (had to have me) re’shit (from the start) darko (head of the caravan) quedem (from the oldest of times) mif’alaw me’az (in the pivotal moment of the Aha!).

“The One who is Many was drawn to me from the start, from the oldest of times, from the head of the caravan, in the pivotal moment of attraction.”  AT 

“The Lord possessed me in the beginning of his way before his works of old.”  Proverbs

 8.  POURING OF THE SELF (Proverbs 8:22-24)

Me’olam nissakhti merosh miqqadamei aretz.

Me’olam (time starts in small parcels from one moment to the next) nissakhti merosh (in this first beginningness, I poured myself like holy wine) miqqadamei aretz (though there was no ground, earth, form or individuality to absorb me).

“Time begins in small parcels of moments, and in this first beginningness, I poured myself like holy wine, though there was no ground, earth, form or individuality to absorb me.”  AT

“I was set up from everlasting, from the beginning, or ever the earth was.  When there were no depths, I was brought forth; when there were no fountains abounding with water.”  Proverbs

9.  DANCING IN THE NEW UNITY  (Proverbs 8:22-24)

Be’en tehemot cholaleti be’en mayonot nikhbaddei mayim.

Be’en tehemot (there was no depth or deep where I could dance as the Great Dark) cholaleti (but I danced anyway, writhing, pausing, waiting, moving in time with my partner, knowing that what would come, had not yet been) be’en mayonot (the spring of existence of beingness) nikhbaddei mayim (from which the glorious, but heavy, flow of life would stream).

“At that time, there was nowhere I could be who I am, but I existed, writhing, pausing, waiting, knowing that what would come had not yet been, yet my young existence was glorious, though heavy, with the streaming flow of life.”  AT

“The Lord possessed me in the beginning of his way, before his works of old. I was set up from everlasting, from the beginning or ever the earth was.  When there were no depths, I was brought forth; when there were no fountains abounding with water.”  Proverbs  KJV

10.  FIRST REMEMBRANCE  (Sura 7:172, Quran)

“Alastu bi rabbikum.  La illaha illa llah. (Question) 

Ba’ala shahidna.  La illaha illa llah.”  (Answer)  Quran (Arabic)

The Quran describes when the One Being reaches into the depths of the First Human and asks the question of all future human beings:

Question: “Do you agree to reflect the fullness of consciousness of all beings who have gone before you, and do you agree that there is only one reality that we all share, One Being behind all of the abundantly diverse forms of being?” 

Answer:  “Why not?  We agree to experience and live by this!”

11.  IN THE IMAGE OF UNITY  (Gen. 1:26)

Nahaseh adam betzalle menou, Nahase adam chide mouthe nou.

Nahaseh (let us inlay into) adam (the first human) betzalle (a living shadow of ourselves) menou, Nahase adam chide mouthe nou.

“Let us inlay into the first human a living consciousness of ourselves.”  AT

“And God said: “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness, and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over the earth, and over every creeping thing and creepeth upon the earth.”  KJV

12. UNFOLDING, MIXING, ROLLING – FOR BETTER AND WORSE  (Gen. 1:28)

Pherou wa rebou wa mila’ou et ha’aretz, wachi-beshuha wa redou b’.

Pherou wa rebou (reign together with the creatures) wa mila’ou (redeem, save, replenish your existence) et ha’aretz (earth, earthiness), wachi-beshuha wa redou b’ (live with, live amongst).

“Live together and amongst, and reign with, all of the other creatures of the earth, and learn to be a human embedded in nature, to redeem and replenish your existence as a human being.”  AT

“Further, God blessed them and God said to them: Be fruitful and become many and fill the earth and subdue it, and have in subjection the fish of the sea and the flying creatures of the heavens and every living creature that is moving upon the earth.”  New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures.

13.  SEVENTH DAY: RENEWAL AND RETURN TO SOURCE  (Gen. 2:3)

Wa i sheboth bayom ha shibihi, wa isheboth elohim mi-chol mila chetho asher hasha.

“Return to the source, and re-member how it all began.”  AT

“And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.”  KJV

14.  CREATION CONTINUES  (John 1:1-5)

B’rishith a itawa hewa melta. (Aramaic)

En arche timi ho logos.  (Greek)

“From the beginning of time, creation continues.”  AT   

II.     SKELETON OUTLINE OF GENESIS/CREATION – Genesis/Creation, Outline I, is the foundation to understanding the origins and possible meanings of Genesis.  Next, the Skeleton Outline of Creation is listed to reveal the process in its simplicity, without the accompanying interpretations. 

It is meant that you reflect upon each one to consider and compare it to how your ideas and creation begin.  To enhance your understanding, bring a creative project or an idea to mind, and compare its manifestation process to the outline below.

II.  SKELETON OUTLINE OF CREATION

1.  BEFORE THE BEGINNING

2.  EXPLORING THE GERM OF THE SEED

3.  PLAYING WITH RESISTANCE, CONFUSING THE CONFUSION

4.  BREATHING INTO THE FLOW

5.  BIRTH OF A NEW CONSCIOUSNESS

6.  CELEBRATING THE NEW CONSCIOUSNESS

7.  EMBRACING THE NEW

8.  POURING OF THE SELF 

9.  DANCING IN THE NEW UNITY

10.  FIRST REMEMBRANCE

11.  THE IMAGE OF UNITY

12.  UNFOLDING, MIXING, ROLLING – FOR BETTER OR WORSE

13.  SEVENTH DAY: RENEWAL AND RETURN TO SOURCE 

14.  CREATION CONTINUES

III.    GENESIS AS A PERSONAL CREATION PROCESS – Interpreting the same outline of the Genesis process, for practical everyday personal understanding and use.

III.    GENESIS AS A PERSONAL CREATION PROCESS

1.  BEFORE THE BEGINNING

I bless what was, bless what is, bless what will be.

2.  EXPLORING THE GERM OF THE SEED

Nothing.  Dark. Void. Without form. 

3.  PLAYING WITH RESISTANCE, CONFUSING THE CONFUSION

Darkness, unknowingness.  I am confused, and things keep getting more confusing.

4.  BREATHING INTO THE FLOW

My breath and spirit self begins to move on the surface of the deep, dark void.  I feel something.  I breathe and am aware with the darkness, but I still don’t know what that “something” is.  But I do know that there is “something”.

5.  BIRTH OF A NEW CONSCIOUSNESS

Breath is married with darkness.  I accept the darkness and breathe with it.  I surrender and have an “aha” moment.  An idea is born.

6.  CELEBRATING THE NEW CONSCIOUSNESS

I look into the first mirror of a new “baby” idea.  Now what do I do with it?

7.  EMBRACING THE NEW

Attraction to the idea.  It had to have me.  I had to have it.

8.  POURING OF THE SELF

I poured myself like Holy Wine into the idea and attraction.

9.  DANCING IN THE NEWNESS

I danced “with” and “in” the newness.

10.  FIRST REMEMBRANCE

I realized that I forgot.  Now, I remember.  I wanted this idea.

11.  THE IMAGE OF UNITY

Within my creation, this idea, this project, a source of consciousness inlays an image of myself.

12.  UNFOLDING, MIXING, ROLLING – FOR BETTER AND WORSE

Following the purpose of my conscious creation, accepting its fate for better and worse,

I walk with purpose while including those who surround me.

I walk with purpose, while including those in my wider community.

I walk with purpose, while connected to the Source of All and all of Creation.

When I lose track, when I forget where I am, I join with others in love and compassion.

13.  RENEWAL AND RETURN TO SOURCE

I rest.  I bless.  I re-member how it all began.  I bless again.

14.  CREATION CONTINUES – I AM / I CAN

I daily create a part of what I AM.  I understand that part of what I am.  I can create. 

I AM… I CAN… I CREATE…

Unveiling the Parable and the Hidden Meaning of Genesis.

Humans are the living story of Genesis—from the darkness of the unknown before a beginning, to becoming a twinkle in the eyes of our parents, to gestating and growing in size within a womb, then being manifested or born of creation, into creation, to continuously create and re-create.  Genesis is in the DNA of our very biological nature: the bloodline, our human lineage from before the beginning, is in our bodies, hearts and souls, to re-member and live the creation process daily.

Psychologically and emotionally understanding the steps of Genesis, can significantly decrease our fear of the unknown and of darkness or “dark times”.  We interpret, understand, and accept that a certain period of void, darkness, and the unknown is needed for any creative aspect of oneself to emerge.  There is no need to be afraid of this process, as it is natural and good.

We can understand that at times, our creations are completely successful.  At other times, ideas fail, but they can be re-created into something better, new, or completely different.  We just need to go back into the void or free space to allow time for consideration.  In terms of natural selection in the natural world, this is also a very real process.  Some live and some don’t, based on various factors like timing and geographical location.

When we begin to pour ourselves into our ideas or projects to manifest, we are “energized” in this newness and flow with it as it continues to come forth.

Manifested, we can continue the project, bless it, and look back and remember.

And the Genesis, or Creation process, lives on, again and again and again.

Genesis as a Personal Creation Process has been compiled and interpreted by Grace Marie, through the book The Genesis Meditations and the CD Beginnings, both written and created by Dr. Neil Douglas-Klotz.  To purchase these and view NDK’s busy worldwide teaching schedule and other important components of his works, visit www.abwoon.com.

For more information and workshops with Grace Marie, contact her at grace@kundagrace.com or visit www.kundagrace.com.

 

 

How about a Hug?
To Hug or Not to Hug
by Grace Marie

This subject is broached from concerns from dancers questioning “hugging” at a public dance meeting.

The Thursday Night Dances of Universal Peace have been present in Fort Collins for 19 years. It has been weekly for around 15 years. Many of us know each other well. We share an intimacy and friendship through the depth of the Dances by the gaze, holding hands, sharing the voice as we sing love to various partners throughout an evening. Embracing after an evening of dance has also been part of this tradition, as it is worldwide. Our intention with the Dances and the embrace is to share a greeting and enjoy the continued intimacy of our friendship.

The issue of embracing has been brought to my attention by dancers, both experienced and those fairly new. One shared that there were people who came for the first time, who will not attend again, because they felt the hugs were “forced” on them. Being a first timer to this kind of intimacy can feel overpowering and “too much”. The last thing any of us want to do at a Peace Dance is to scare new people away because of an embrace whose intention should be, and is for many, innocent and loving. For others, it is invasive and uncomfortable.

A second dancer shared that even experienced long timers felt the embraces were prolonged and felt inappropriate with certain people.

Another dancer shared her experience with me personally, that a man’s hand, more than once, went to places on her body during a dance, that she felt violated. She does not attend the dances anymore.

This is a very intimate subject: the physical touch that happens at a public Dance of Universal Peace and what feelings may arise for some.

In my research to write something that would give insight, comfort and suggestions, I approached it first by researching the roots and definitions of “embrace” and “hug”.

“embrace”: Verb
1. To take or clasp in the arms, press to the bosom, hug, usually as an expression of affection.
2. Cherish, love
3. Encircle, enclose, surround We allowed the warm water to embrace us.
4. To take in or include as a part of a more inclusive whole, the Dances embrace all traditions, encyclopedia embraces a great number of subjects
5. To be equal or equivalent
6. To take or receive gladly or eagerly, accept willingly, to avail oneself of: embrace an idea, embrace a tradition or religion, embrace an opportunity
Middle English, from Anglo-French embracer, from en + brace (pair of arms): 14th century
Synonyms: adopt, include, espouse, welcome, cover, embody
Antonyms: exclude

“hug”:
Noun: a tight clasp with the arms; embrace.
Verbs: 1. To clasp or hold closely, especially in the arms, as in affection; embrace.
2. To hold steadfastly to; cherish: He still hugs his outmoded beliefs.
3. To stay close to: a sailboat hugging the shore.
Origin: 1560-70, Norwegian hugga, to soothe, console, to care for.

An embrace or a hug has been a tradition at the closure of Dances of Universal Peace meetings. There are many who heartily engage in this tradition and look forward to it. Some have said they would not attend if hugs were not available. And others do not attend because of it.

Some dances have hugs as part of the movement of the dance. Some partners engage deeply in the embrace, prolonging and slowing down the dance throwing off the timing. Others give a quick “A” frame hug and move quickly to the next movement also throwing off the timing. Two different dancers, two different kinds of hugs.

While researching “Hugging” online with Google and at the libraries in Colorado, I found something very interesting, in that only children’s titles appeared. Here is a list of a few hugging book titles for children: The Hugging Hour, Hugging the Rock, Daddy Hugs, Mommy Hugs, Suddenly, they’re 13: The Art of Hugging a Cactus, Won’t you be my Hugaroo, Hug Time, The Giant Hug, The Cuddle Book, It’s Hug Day, A Hug for You, Hugs for Cats, Hug your Dog, Hug Me and the list is goes on for a hundred or more.

When using the search words “the art of hugs” the top two titles were: Chocolate for a Woman’s Soul, and Things Just haven’t been the same: the Transition from Marriage to Parenthood.

Continuing the library search for adults using the word “embraces”, #1 – 4 came up as: Embraces: Dark Erotica, Accusing Embraces: needful, painful remembering in Beloved, Twisted Triangle, and, believe it or not, Weeds, Season One.

Wow. Hugging for children sounds really great, loving and innocent compared to the adults.

Wikipedia says, “A hug is a form of physical intimacy that usually involves closing or holding the arms around another person or group of persons. The hug is one of the most common human signs of love and affection. Unlike some other forms of physical intimacy, it is practiced publicly and privately without stigma in many countries, religions and cultures, within families, and also across age and gender lines.
Sometimes, hugs are a romantic exchange. Hugs may also be exchanged as a sign of support and comfort. A hug can be a demonstration of affection and emotional warmth, sometimes arising out of joy or happiness at meeting someone.

Brief in most cases, it is used to show many levels of affection. It is not particular to human beings alone, as there are many species of animals that engage in similar exchanges of warmth.

Hugging has been proven to have health benefits. One study has shown that hugs increase levels of oxytocin, and reduces blood pressure. The New York Times has reported that “the hug has become the favorite social greeting when teenagers meet or part these days” in the United States.”

The last line gives me a smile and hope for the future generation. I found the link to the New York Times article “For Teenagers, Hello means “How about a hug?” The photos and videos are great. www.nytimes.com/2009/05/28/style/28hugs.html

In my experience of teaching in South America at Dance events or other social circles, when total strangers are introduced, the two people exchange a kiss on the cheek, sometimes both cheeks. Some countries love to hug in addition to a kiss or two on the cheek. Some are somewhat reserved in hugging, but will hug and definitely practice the kiss on the cheek versus a handshake. In Mexico, everyone is family, so everyone hugs, kisses and laughs. In Europe, many Russians give a deep, strong bear hug. Some English hug deeply, some are reserved. In the United States, it can be anything from a handshake to a deep embrace. There are as many kinds of hugs as there are people.

The practice of hugging is part of many, if not most, Dance circles, but rarely discussed. The local dancers began a “hugging” discussion. Fantastic. We are talking about it ! When we are aware of an issue, it gives an opportunity for growth in becoming more sensitive and conscious, and the result may be a stronger person, community, and dance circle, that we can all take responsibility for our own actions, and help or assist those we see or feel need it. What could be so simple and natural for many is not so simple for many, as well. We need to be aware and conscious of how our physical touch during a dance can affect some people.

A hug is not a peace dance requirement nor is it something we should take for granted. Based on the few titles about “Hugging” for adults, we may seriously consider, as human beings, and as a community, to begin conscious, sensitive “hug” development. This may sound crazy to some. What happens to people from child to adult with sensitivity to “hugs” is related to love, goodness, family, but it also could be lack of trust, betrayal and pain. It may take time to develop the depth, consciousness and innocence of a loving gesture.

Suggestions on How to Hug or Not to Hug at a public Dances of Universal Peace meeting anywhere in the world are listed below. There are no doubt many other ways we could list. These suggestions can be practiced at the dance, and then used outside of the dance space for personal empowerment practice.

No judgments are needed or wanted on how people face this issue and work
with it on their own. We simply honor and respect other’s choices.

Before we move to the suggestions, consider these:
Personal boundaries are unique to every individual. We can empower individuals to honor their boundaries. We acknowledge the intimate nature of the Dances of Universal Peace and emphasize/encourage dancers to honor one’s own and other people’s boundaries.

Hugs on Automatic Pilot: Hugging can be a “habitual” group behavior where the group goes on “automatic pilot” rather than hugs being a genuine expression of the living presence of “loving kindness” that has emerged from the group practice of the Dances of Universal Peace. This suggests one to be sensitive, be mindful and considerate to this dynamic.

Neediness versus Mindfulness: Sometimes we are driven by our neediness for human physical contact. It is not about right nor wrong, it is just part of being human. What is the level of our needs and the intent of our hugs?

Hugging can be a practice where we remain present to our breath and heartbeat, as well as the connection to the other person and their energies. It can be a practice to help us be present in the moment and share our intention to express “loving kindness” void of sexual energies or personal neediness.

Creating a Sacred Connection WITH Hugs:

- Make eye contact, follow the movements and body language of the other person to avoid clumsiness.

- Be welcoming when you hug. If either of you requested the hug, then be warm and loving creating the feeling of safety from anything else and that the two of you are the only that matter at that moment.

- Consider posture, strength, and duration.

- Do not confuse a “friend” hug with a “lover” hug, as things may get awkward and complicated.

- Unless you’ve hugged the person before, don’t hug them without asking first. Use judgment and discernment.

- If you know the person well, and have been hugging for many years, by all means, enjoy the hug deeply and profoundly.

Creating a Sacred Connection WITHOUT a Hug:

- Be assertive and courageous with what your needs are with each person using your own energy through body language or say what you need.

- If you see someone approach you with open arms, extend a hand out for a handshake. For myself, many times I prefer a handshake while looking into the eyes of a person.

- Put your palms together at your heart and bow.

- Exit the dance circle space.

We want to leave a dance feeling good. Take care of yourself. Be mindful of others.

There is a lot that goes with a simple HUG for adults. And why not? For a normal adult person off the street who has never experienced the Dances, to be faced with holding hands with men/men, women/men, women/women, and then asked to hug these strange new people, can, and is, very intimidating. And for some of the more experienced, it is something they look forward to because of a stressful life, and find comfort in the sacred space of the dances and relationships new and old.

Each person comes into the Dance with their own personality and history. I feel, we must be conscious and aware of body language, feeling the energy, and making a good decision to create a safe atmosphere for relationships, new and not so new, through the physical touch that happens at a public dance meeting.

As a dance leader, I cannot monitor everyone’s behaviors but I can share what comes to me from participants for your awareness and mine. Not everyone has the privilege to have a weekly dance circle. It is not easy on many levels. One dance per month, let’s say, has a very different dynamic than one that is weekly for as long as we have had ours. It is not just about simply leading the movements, words and attunement. It is not just about dancing. It is about the practice of developing the relationship with our inner and outer lives.

Through feedback from dancers about issues as “hugging”, one can have awareness and develop our sense of intimate comfort level with it no matter where we are, when faced with it.

It may take time for this to really sink in deeply. A change or shift in the way we think or do things may seem uncomfortable at first, but the long term benefits will prevail.

Comments from local dancers on this subject:

- “Since embracing is part of some of the partner dances, I would add that it is important to keep hugs appropriate during the dances as well … some of those hugs are the ones that I personally object to because I find it difficult to set boundaries when it is part of the dance.”

- “Seems to me that getting a discussion started after a person feels uncomfortable over certain actions is the key. If they are new to the Dances and were brought by someone who has been dancing for some time, to have the ‘old-timer’ check in with them afterward about how things went. We want to know about situations such as “I liked the Dances, but…” The point being to encourage people to talk to someone (the leader, a friend who will then talk to the leader, etc.) about any problems/issues they may feel about inappropriate behavior in the Dances.

That said, I think there are two aspects of the hug ‘problem’ for some people: the ‘amount’ of the hug (the pressure, contact, etc.) and the duration. Some people can handle hugging, but only lightly and for very short periods. Anything more than that and it goes beyond what they can safely handle. So, unless you know the person is a ‘hugger’ it is best to start with the least amount of hug for a short time i.e. a quick, light hug.
For people that have issues with being assertive (easily half the population or more) they may not even be able to tell the others they don’t want a hug (using a bow, handshake, etc.) as everyone else is hugging because then they will be singled out. It’s complicated.”

- “I am always surprised at the fact that some people do not know how to express THEMSELVES when it comes to intimacy. I realize that there are many out there who have issues with intimacy and they bring all that baggage with them wherever they go. If anyone in the dance circle were ever inappropriate with ME I would personally let that person know that that was inappropriate and NOT hug that person again. Hey, but that’s me. My only suggestion would be that possibly we as a group try an experiment where when we are at the “hug” portion of the dance we approach everyone in a namaste posture and if the person being approached reaches out to hug, then we take their lead. As I know and you know, you will not be able to please everyone, and on that note the dances may not be for everyone. Certainly, as a newcomer being hugged by a bunch of “strangers” could be overwhelming, but I still do think that people exist out there in the REAL world and somehow find a way to avoid situations and people that make them uncomfortable. Why not at the dances?
As always, I am always amazed with the “stuff” you have to deal with as our LEADER.”

- “I believe that the Dances can/should provide a “safe” place for all people.
Those afraid or uncomfortable with intimacy, whether it is eye contact, touching, hugging or holding hands could benefit from being in a safe place where people “appropriately” share intimacy. They would have the opportunity to participate at their current level, and progress to deeper intimacy as it unfolds for them.

In order to create a “safe” place for intimacy, it must begin with trust, and that means that those already attending, longer-time dancers cannot “overdo” intimacy, but instead, need to practice meeting the newer people (or less intimately open) at the other’s level – and not assume everyone feels the same way.”

- “At thousands of dance meetings over the last 20 years, I have been hugged in about every conceivable way. I continue to see it as an experience of meeting a person as they are, and my predominate experience is one of touching a mystical space together for a moment. “Out beyond ideas of right and wrong, there is a place, I’ll meet you there”. With some, it is a reunion in that space, with others an invitation with respect……..It’s those damn hormones that we adults bring to the table/ dance circle that can put the devil in the details. A potential new mantra: “I am larger than my hormones.” And a second: “I am larger than my fears of intimacy.” Good work with a tough subject.”

- “Wow, I appreciate your reflections and research on hugging. I respect you as a leader for taking this so to your heart and how you have honored “both sides” of the hug spectrum. Your examples of gracefully saying ‘no’ to a hug is important.”

- “Grace, I think your writing is right on. I know that there are many current dancers that will appreciate your attention to this matter, also. It’s a very tricky issue because like you said, to some the hugging is wonderful – and to others, it is invasive and/or intrusive. Getting it out in the open is the first step to change and thank you for doing that.”

I begin this correspondence with much on my mind, as you will soon read.

First, how could I have waited until my 53rd year of life to read authors Charlotte Bronte, Jane Austen, Jean Rhys, and Virginia Woolf?

Second, and obscurely related to the above, today, I drafted a flyer for a November Sufi workshop The Sufi Heart of Life. So how do those 2 relate; British women authors and Sufism? I sat in deep thought pondering this as I considered how I could use this approach teaching a Sufi workshop.

My strange yet poignant links of thought are interrupted by Jasmine, my 28-year-old daughter, who has asked me to read her college paper on The Effect of Music and Background Noise for her psychology class. I must say the paper is extremely interesting which says that a person needs to train oneself to hear a speech clearly while musical background noise is present. I am familiar with this concept as a teacher, musician, dancer and dance leader. The psychology theory is, that if one becomes proficient to think clearly with distractions, we have attained or have a high level of intelligence.

I will compare this to everyday life. Is the concept above related also to doing a variety of different tasks while thinking clearly for all of them, much as I am multi-tasking my way through this afternoon? I read her paper, continue to write this, stop to cut onions, garlic, bok choy, zucchini, carrots, basil for a hearty soup, while taking a moment in between to throw a log in my wood stove on this cold, rainy, fall day. Could they be compared? Yes.

In addition, thoughts appear of my upcoming class on the first 4 lines of the Aramaic Lord’s Prayer, the formation of the Abwoon Choir, and compare the similarities of Jesus and Virginia Woolf.

Our guide in AILP, Neil (Saadi), has, at times, said Jesus was a woman in a man’s body. Virginia Woolf in her book, A Room of One’s Own, writes that androgyny, or the integration of both masculine and feminine is essential. Jean Rhys, in Wide Sargasso Sea, says how she will be for her man “as wise as the serpent, and as tender as a dove.”

How can I integrate the teachings of 2 men, Jesus and Neil, into the body of a woman, me? Aha! I know what to do: it is time to get inside the character and insides of the man and practice Tasawwuri to imagine what they feel, and be inspired by their imagination to feel mine. This clarity of what to do comes immediately, with remembrance of the word Tasawwuri, a Sufi practice, but connect it to seeing the results of this practice in the documentary Shakespeare Behind Bars, where prisoners (all men) take on the characters in a Shakespeare play (including the roles of women) to understand their own minds more fully and to practice mercy and compassion (ir Rahman ir Rahim) by feeling the character and feelings of another (like those of the women they murdered). Well, then this film characterizes Sufi practices !

Yesterday, I watched a guitar instructional video on playing the Blues. The instructor consistently mentions names of other guitarists from whom he learned the techniques he was about to teach us. Hmmmm……..I often do this when I am teaching dances. For example, this dance comes from so and so in Germany, this comes from my teacher, Saadi, that dance from Sabira in Brazil, and etc………..It affirms the acknowledgement of teachers, as the guitar teacher in the video, as Virginia Woolf mentions Jane Austen and the Bronte sisters, and Neil mentions authors who have inspired him.

I will make a bold statement. The wholeness of self: human, emotional, mental and spiritual, comes from many sources: Hochma’s table, so to speak, using our Peace Dances and AILP group’s lingo. A person not related to the latter groups mentioned may innocently ask, who or what is Hochma? Is it a hook you would hang your mother up on? I would explain what it means, thus, spreading the Word and general understanding of the term to someone who is hearing it for the first time. And, in return, I learn a Blues riff, so I can sing the Blues in the cozy comfort and safety of my soul.

The person to whom I have just taught Hochma, can now contemplate for years as I have, the idea of inviting all aspects of onesself to a table, to have a one way conversation with the question of who exactly am I at this table of myself?

And, me, I will spend years learning the one Blues riff on the guitar that they taught me.

Balanced. Giving and Receiving.

At the same time during all of the above, a cord of split pine is being stacked under the eaves of my home by a beautiful young man to keep my home warm and cozy during the cold days and nights. The wood, not the man, will keep me cozy, by the way, for better or worse.

Conclusion 1, tested and confirmed: I can listen to a speech with music and background noise and understand what the speech is about, therefore, I must have some highish level of intelligence.

Conclusion 2: Relating Jasmine’s college psychology paper to our intimate group and comparing also multi-tasking, we teachers, dancers, musicians and dance leaders must have an extremely high level of intelligence because not only can we clearly understand a speech, listen to a melody, learn the melody, learn the words and meaning of a strange, foreign, lingual phrase, with music and noise in the background, but we also accomplish a good number of tasks simultaneously, like do the grapevine step to the right and send off love, peace, harmony and beauty, to a billion or more sentient beings.

Just wanted to share a real part of me and a few thoughts on this gray, then sunny, then rainy, gray, sunny, rainy day, where anything can change at anytime.

Jasmine forewarned me that her next college paper would be on Sociology and Bureaucracy. Hopefully, I will read it on a good day where my humor can be accessed easily. It will be interesting to read the take on it from a 28 year old, still somewhat innocent and new to the world, from her mother’s point of view. Yet, her innocent perspective may soften my heart and help me change my current cynical one.

The soup is ready. Jasmine’s at the table. Better join that aspect of myself. She has had 2 bowls now. No complaints. Good sign. No Sufi breath practice needed. I smile and eat.

Much love from the crazy woman in the attic,

Grace Marie